Backblast by Billy Goat (Dylan) on 10/31/2022

Twenty-Six PAX declared, “I ain’t ‘fraid of no goat” at Agoge this morning. Functional training for a night full of trick-or-treating was on the menu. Warmarama included four stalwarts: Side Straddle Hop, Good Morning, Willie Mays Hays and Murderkins. Without announcing the nature of a Murderkin, YHQ proceeded to count off standard merkins in cadence…to failure (only 19×2, but no one ever accused a goat of being upper body dominant).
The first order of business for trick-or-treat training was finding costumes. YHQ came prepared as “Rio” (i.e. a total homer in a monochromatic getup). Kudos to Counterfeit for showing up in full FNG regalia! YHQ sequestered the services of Floppy Disk, Thingamabob, and Oscar Mayer as “Q Jackman” candidates and distributed “X-Men” costumes (Cyclops ski googles, Deadpool mask, and Wolvie mask). Moseying to the nearest grassy knoll, “murder bunny” props went to Team 1 before commencing a set of CMU-less murder bunnies (gorilla walks) up the hill and to the end of the walkway lights. A lap around Patterson Hall took the PAX to Station 2 where Team 2 transformed into Witchy WomHIMs and executed “Bolt 45s” in plie squat/goddess stance form.

Station 3 featured animal masks and monkey humpers. Station 4 was a Jedi Mindtrick with Star Wars props distributed before YHQ called “Force Merkins” where both hands and feet were to leave the ground in true flying squirrel style. After starting position, the PAX instead moseyed on to Station 5 for Balls to the Wall with the GloboGym Purple Cobras gathering dodgeballs for the easiest DIY costume of all. Station 6 was a bargain bin of unwanted costumes and shake weights before launching the Main Event.

Six positions of heavy bags (50-75 lbs) simulating an eight year old and his pillow case full of candy were placed at the curb while Kettlebells ranging from 27 to 50 lbs were stationed at the top of the Ledford stairs. Each team of four progressed through 4 stations of 1) Sprintees (a burpee followed by merkin to sprint), 2) various core work led by the Q Jackmans, 3) heavy carry up the steps, 10 KB swings, heavy carry down the steps. PAX collected a piece of candy after completion of each round and pushed on repeat to 0613.

Forming up on time at the flag, 42 birthday burpees were executed in honor of Ascot. Great push, Men!

Stop by Floppy’s house for a treat before the little goblins get all the goodies.

Prayers for Ascot’s wife and for Wrigley’s girlfriend.

Happy Halloween!